Tsup?
Yo Pallys,
Sometimes I wish I had less give-a-damn to go around. Fact is, I care too much. It doesn't accomplish much.
I'm the worst for it when it comes to my jobs. I take my work seriously no matter how menial coworkers or anyone else see it as. Caring too much about things others think are stupid poses problems. It causes me to behave counter-productively, either because I annoy others or think with my heart.
And then when I see that I've mildly screwed up something that means a lot to me, I get depressed, and only wish I could just not care. It would be nice if there were some rewarding occupation that actually prized this trait.
I care too much about people too, sometimes. Sometimes people would be better off without me but I can't let them go because I want to be more for them.
In the end, knowing this doesn't change me, because I can't turn it off anyway. I still care, even until it hurts. But when I can take a deep breath and fake calm for a bit, things tend to get back to normal for a little while. I just have to keep trying to be normal, while still being me.
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